Happy Parents, Happy Kids: Why Parents Should Be Their Own Priority

Nearly all parents say that their children come first, and they would do everything to provide them with what's needed to enable them a happy and healthy life. But what if someone tells you, you have to be your own top priority? It simply sounds wrong for many. It isn't, because if you as a parent aren't happy, your children won't be either. 

You can't pour from an empty cup! 

The danger of being burned out as a mother or father is huge if limitations are not accepted, and you go beyond your limits for a long time. Often it is demanding on yourself as a parent that overwhelms you. We have an idea of what life should be like, what a parent should achieve, how a modern family should live, what standard of living one should have, what should be offered to our children. And we tend to forget to think about ourselves. 

 How can you find the balance between prioritizing your kids and yourself? How can you be happier and more fulfilled in your life and therefore be an excellent example for your children? 

Coping with stress through mindfulness and self-care

In the parenting role, we are emotionally touched and challenged more intensely than anywhere else. We are charged with expectations, uncertainty, and perhaps also fears to do something wrong. At the same time, becoming a parent changes everything, our rhythm of life, the flow of time, the time for partnership, and, last but not least, crucially, the time we have for ourselves.

Parents who can approach themselves with mindfulness and self-compassion exemplify this and thus provide an example of some of the most critical foundations for feeling satisfied and happy in the long term. Everything you do for yourself; you do for your children too. You don't need to have a guilty conscience, if you take care of yourself - the opposite!

Here are three examples of how you can be your own top priority with mindfulness:

1. Slow things down - Mindful Mornings

Slowing things down, stepping back and observing your own reactions, can give you the perspective to effectively restructure your family's morning routine for example. Wake up your kids earlier than usual. Yes, you will have to get up sooner, too, but if you start mornings with a happy mood instead of stress, everyone will be in a much better mood for the rest of the day. You won't be stressed, which means your children will be in a much better mood, too.

2.  Become friends with "Less efficient, but more pleasurable"

Stop stressing. You transfer your stress to your kids. Take your time in whatever you do, allow just 10 minutes for yourself and be in the moment. Check in with yourself, how you are doing. It doesn't matter, if the laundry will be done later. Sometimes less efficient ways are needed not to ruin the whole day. Will you be five minutes late at pre-school? The world won't stop spinning because of that. Relax, take the time you and your kids need. Be here, right now, and don't stress already about what's coming next. 

3. Take Me-Time

Every parent needs some me-time, but with the constant pressure to do everything right, we don't allow it. Take a bath, meet with a friend, alone, without the kids, enjoy the time at the hairdressers, read a book. You will be a lot more resilient for possible stress situations to come. 

Conclusion

Happy parents have happy kids. It's as simple as that. Even if you do everything "right" according to society's or your own expectation on how to be the "perfect" parent - if you're not balanced, how can your kids be?